Ooh, an alligator is loose in Michigan. Maybe it will bite you when you go swimming. Ooh - and that mouth with all those teeth. Ooh, scary.

C'mon 2020 - I'm not impressed. This is so beneath you - you're just phoning it in now.

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It is true. There is an alligator loose in southeast Michigan. In Macomb County's Clinton Township, someone's pet alligator got out and is now roaming the streets or sewers of Clinton Township (I'm trying to help you out, 2020)

Clearly, 2020 has decided to go back to the classics. Alligator on the loose?

You mean like in 2018?

Or, in Lansing, in 2019?

Or, later in 2019?

Don't tell anyone - this latest one is only a foot long. I guess it could bite you, but the bigger danger (IMO) would be if you stepped on it in the dark, accidentally - and twisted an ankle.

According to the headline on MLive.com, "police ask for help catching it".  But don't touch it. And don't step on it. You could twist an ankle.

Here's the story.

Ooh - maybe there's one in the sinkhole in Alpena: