10 Reasons NOT to Move to Michigan

Thinking about moving to Michigan? You might want to think again.

Here are 10 reasons you might not like it here.

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Too Many Lakes

According to the Michigan Department of Natural Resources, "Michigan has 11,000 inland lakes, more freshwater shoreline than any other state in the nation, tens of thousands of miles of rivers and streams, and more than 3,000 miles of water trails."

That's overkill. No state needs that many lakes.

The People Are Too Nice

Maybe you're coming from an area where people don't hold open doors, don't give to charities, and would never assist a stranded motorist.

That's so much better than Michigan. People here are usually very nice to each other.

Michigan Experiences All Four Seasons

Perhaps you've heard of them - winter, spring, summer, and fall?

Michigan experiences each one of these seasons very distinctly. Its fall colors are breathtaking; its winters can be quite cold and snowy, and it's gorgeous in springtime.

Which leads us to...

The Summers Are Too Perfect

If you're hoping to move to a place where the temperatures are in the 90s and 100s all summer, you're going to be sorely disappointed.

While the weather can occasionally get that warm, it's not the general rule. You're more likely to experience 70s and 80s as daytime highs during a Michigan summer. That's obviously too comfortable.

Michigan Tries to Fool You With Fake Oceans

Michigan is surrounded by four of the five Great Lakes - literally surrounded. No matter where you are in the state, you're never further than 85 miles from one of them.

But despite what they may look like - they're not oceans. They are salt-free. You're looking at the largest freshwater bodies of water in the entire country.

Too Much Fishing

No matter whether you're on the shores of one of Michigan's afore-mentioned 11,000+ inland lakes, or in a boat on one of the Great Lakes - you're likely to see someone fishing.

As Outdoor Adventures puts it, "anglers can find walleye, perch, bass and more. So whether you’re looking for a breathtakingly beautiful lake or river, a spot to cast your line for a trophy trout, or a peaceful spot to try your luck at panfish – Michigan has it all."

Too Many Weird Foods/Drinks You've Never Heard Of

Hold up. Is that a chili dog? Looks like one, but that's not chili. It looks like taco meat!

Michiganders like their coney dogs. They're a delicacy best enjoyed with a Koegel's hot dog and ordered Flint-style (a very specific mixture of spiced ground beef and onions) - topped with mustard and diced onions.

If you don't have an adventurous spirit, you probably wouldn't want to try a Vernor's either. It's a strong ginger ale that not only can clear out your sinuses - many believe it can cure anything that ails you.

Just weird.

It Gets Too Dark

There are parts of Michigan that get so dark at night, you can see portions of the Milky Way you've probably never seen before.

Michigan's home to one of the world's 10 original "international dark sky parks". Headlands International Dark Sky Park in Emmet County is extremely protected from artificial light sources, so much so that you can often see shooting stars and sometimes witness the Northern Lights!

You'd hate it.

Michigan Is Pretentious

Michigan has two peninsulas - the Lower Peninsula where most of the state's population lives; and the Upper Peninsula (or U.P.), which is almost like an entirely different state.

No other state comes in two pieces. Kind of pompous, huh?

Too Much Variety

Michigan prides itself on having "something for everybody". It's got big cities like Detroit and Grand Rapids, quaint country towns, and a wide variety of recreational outdoor opportunities. Way too much variety.