Just Like That, The Giraffe Came Back And There Was Much Rejoicing
It was Tuesday morning. August 24th. Shortly before 10 am. Something had happened. There was a shift. A change in the atmosphere. Something was different.
He was back.
And it was good.
Spread the word. Tell the children.
The giraffe has returned to the roof of the Meijer gas station on W. Saginaw Highway.
All is right in the world again.
Just when things had seemed bleak.
Starbucks had unleashed Pumpkin Spice hell upon us way before it's time.
Calling all the basic boys and girls! Pumpkin Spice Latte is officially back at Starbucks this week so bust out the Ugg boots and cozy sweaters.
Starbucks announced that their famous Pumpkin Spice Latte will be available to customers beginning Tuesday, the 24th.
Read More: Pumpkin Spice Latte is Back at Starbucks on Tuesday! Yes, Already
The people had lost their way and turned to horse and cow drugs to save them from the scourge of the plague (I'm being over dramatic here but they did start using this stuff).
The NY Post published an article that the FDA has had to issue a warning to COVID sufferers about the dangers of using a horse and cow de-wormer to treat their symptoms.
The warning came after a report about the rise in phone calls to poison control centers from people using the drug Ivermectin, which is commonly used to treat things like heartworm in horses and other animals.
Read More: Officials: Stop Taking Animal Medicine to Protect Against COVID
The blessed giraffe is back. Back I tell you. Even though he never really truly left us did he?
He's always been right here with us all along...not just in our hearts. But...in this corral right beside the old gas station and in front of the Meijer.
Thank you Meijer giraffe. You've been with us for 50 years and your return (even though you never really left us) says you'll be here for many, many more.
Crisis averted.
Now...Starbucks? I mean, they're there an we might as well drink em right?
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