Lesson Learned: The Story About the Snake That Bit Me

THEY GOT ME...GOOD!

Did you hear that a snake had been found Ireland for the first time in over 1500 years? Do you remember the story of St. Patrick sending the danger noodles into the sea? Apparently, it's why we have green beer in March...right?

The headline I saw read: “Snake found in Ireland for first time ever.” So, what did I do? I clicked the link, scanned the story, and said to myself, “Self, this would be a great way for you to find out more about the WITL audience. Ask them about the weirdest place they’ve seen a snake and then write about it.

THE INTERNET SAVED THE DAY

But here’s the problem. That story? The one I didn’t read in its entirety...was an April Fool’s Day prank. And I fell for it. Beyond the life lesson (read the WHOLE story even the fine print and ask yourself, “Why are the residents donating old socks...wait, ah, jeez) ANYWAY...beyond the life lesson there’s this: I learned some things about Ireland and Michigan while researching data for this story:

1. Michigan has 18 native species of snake and only one that’s venomous, the eastern Massasauga rattlesnake.

Eastern Massasauga Rattlesnake
Photo courtesy of Wide Open Spaces

By comparison, Ireland only has one native terrestrial reptile species, the common lizard. The other places I call home? Oklahoma—home to 46 native snake species and 7 of them are venomous. Virginia—30 native species and 3 are venomous.

2. Michigan gets more snow than Ireland even though Ireland is over ten degrees further North. They have more rainy days and cloudy days than Michigan as well.

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	Dublin, Ireland	Lansing, Michigan
Avg Annual Temp	~50°F (10°C)	~48°F (9°C)
Rainy Days/Year	~150–225 days	~130–160 days
Snowfall	Minimal	~50–60 inches/year
Cloudy Days	~70% of the year	~60–70% of the year

2. Michigan is home to 10 native turtle species including your state reptile the Painted turtle (Chrysemys picta).

Painted Turtle, Michigan's State Reptile
Photo by Ashlee Marie on Unsplash

Ireland has no native turtle species but five endangered sea turtle species—the leatherback (Dermochelys coriacea), loggerhead (Caretta caretta), green (Chelonia mydas), Kemp's ridley (Lepidochelys kempii), and olive ridley (Lepidochelys olivacea)—have been seen in Irish waters.

3. Ireland residents can’t tell stories like this:

My brother put a snake in a jar and brought it in the house. It got out of the jar, crawled between the extra sheets in closet, and had babies. Mom found it. Needless to say, she was really mad at him~~Mae C.

It slithered through the hole for the cable wires and into the living room.~~Pam K

(Found in the) Toilette~~Wendy L-B

MORE SNAKES, MORE SNOW, MORE SCARY STORIES--MICHIGAN WINS!

My snake story? Rock climbing in the Wichita Mountain Wildlife Refuge, pulled up a rock face and came face to face with a nest of baby rattlers. Good times, good times.

Good on Ireland for getting me with the April Fool’s Day Prank. Y’all can keep your snakeless-ness. We'll be keeping the green beer.

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