Jukebox Etiquette for When You’re Out at Michigan Bars

I remember when a $5 bill would get you at least ten songs on the jukebox, no matter where you were in Michigan. Nowadays, $5 is a drop in the bucket. Which is why I want to talk about jukebox etiquette.

Have You Ever Used a Digital Jukebox?

I went out this weekend in celebration of my birthday, and I noticed that the bar had a digital jukebox and you could pay to listen to the songs you want. Now, "in the olden days", I could put my money in, pick my songs, and I could walk away confident that I would hear what I paid for. However, that was not my experience this weekend.

I paid my money, I picked out a handful of songs (via an app on my phone, mind you, not the actual jukebox itself), and I was sure that I'd hear them right away. Two vodka and sodas, later, I had only heard one of the five songs I had picked. I opened up the app to see what was going on, and apparently some paid more to kick my songs further down the playlist in favor of their own.

What. The. Heck. When did this become the norm?

So I figured I'd be there for a little bit still, and I wanted to hear at least one more of my songs, so I paid to bump one of mine. By the time I left the bar that night, I had spent a grand total of $10 and had heard exactly two of the five songs I paid to hear.

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Jukebox etiquette should be that you pay to hear your songs, you pick your songs, and then you wait your turn to hear them. Instead, the person with the most money in their wallet controls the jukebox for the night, and we have to be subjected to 9 minutes of Jesus of Suburbia by Green Day.

Do better, Michigan bar patrons.