Banana Don’s Slice Of Americana – YOU Can Help Make Michigan Safe

Ladies and gentlemen, the Department of Homeland Security is asking for your help. Recently, the individual pictured below was captured on security cameras at a rural location in southern Clinton County, Michigan.

Here's another photo of this individual - walking non-nonchalantly and trying to "blend in" with his surroundings.

He should be considered a threat to you, your pets and your vegetation. If you see this individual anytime between now and sundown of January 1st, please report him to our local representative, "Banana Don" Jefferson at 517-363-2233. Do not attempt to shoot him yourself or hit him with your vehicle. Our local representative, Banana Don, will be dispatched to deal with the situation. Unless he finds out about an individual who is even more dangerous due to more antler points. Or his wife has a really important project for him that day.

Thank you. You may now return to your Candy Crush Saga game or Kate Upton photos.